. . . there is more to life than your children.
I had had one of those weeks where it seemed liked every time I turned around, I ran into a pile of dirty clothes, stepped in a pile of crumbs, tripped over a pile of toys . . . piles, piles, piles. And to make it more aggravating, my youngest was trying to walk and couldn’t quite figure it out, so he was attached to the backs of my jeans using me as a giant walker. The oldest was bored of the rain, bored of his toys, and bored of his brother not being able to walk. In short, I needed a night out.
I called my friend, also a hip mother of small children and said, “Girl, this week has kicked my butt. I need to get out. Are you in?” Of course! What mom isn’t ready to ditch the family life for a night out with a friend sans children? I was REALLY looking forward to this; I really needed it. We met at a hip coffeeshop with low lights and comfortable couches. I wore a hip outfit that melded with the fun atmosphere of the coffeeshop. I fixed my hair and make up. I anticipated great conversation, new ideas, and a break from the routine of daily mothering.
Instead, we talked about kids, or rather she talked about her kids. The entire time. I kept trying to divert the conversation to the news, religion, taxes, fashion, celebrity gossip, anything that didn’t directly involve poop, spit-up, or potty training. The night was a colossal failure. I returned home from my big night out more enervated than I was when I left.
Now don’t get me wrong – I love to talk about my kids as much as the next parent, but I crave conversations that don’t always revolve around the kids. I crave adult conversation. To get that, I need to have something interesting to talk about. So, I read the paper on Sundays, I belong to a bookclub and read at least one book a month, I watch a couple minutes of the news each day or listen to NPR on the radio. I don’t devote a lot of time to it (because, seriously, as a new mom wouldn’t you rather take a nap?), but I do enough so that if I happen upon another person craving conversation involving more than diapers and sleeping routines, I can actually contribute in some small meaningful way.
In short, it can be hip to chat up your little cherubs. It’s fun to share the trials and tribulations of motherhood. But it’s the hip mom way to have other things to talk about, too, especially if your big night out is with a friend who has her own little cherubs waiting for her at home.
